A Note About Pictures *FOTD*

So, my FOTD inclues a bit of a purple scheme. With purple lid and sparkling silver crease, and a bit of a purple gloss. I think it is a Jade eyeshadow palette, a moderate drugstore brand. Foundation is Neutrogena Liquid--I'm not sure what it is, but it's oil free and promotes health, and the powder is Neutrogena as well--a powder I swear by, because it gives me a pretty flawless finish in real life /and/ heals blemishes.
Speaking of blemishes. I don't like putting pictures up, because I think it scares people. Really, who wants to look at /that/? The reality is, is that I'm fifteen years old. I have acne, and I know that most people in their teens and twenties and even thirties can be affected by it as well. Blemishes can completely destroy ones life. Checking your face every thirty minutes to make sure you're concealed, it can lead to depression. Depression can lead to suicide. This is Depression Awareness Month, and it's good to support depression. Lots of people are affected by depression, and most don't think it's a big enough problem to talk to anyone about it. Personal appearance can lead to depression. I don't know about any of you, but when I see gurus like Michelle Phan--who is absolutely incredible--anyone's skin can look terrible. The gurus seem flawless. Celebrities seem flawless. And looking at these pictures can make you feel bad.
I'm getting better, really, at..not worrying too much about what others think. Finding humility. And my skin isn't /that/ bad, really. I have a few breakouts on my cheeks and a few whiteheads every now and then, but it's really during my special time of the month. Like seriously, there's this ten day period of every month where I'm terrible, like now. It doesn't just look bad, it hurts. And it makes me feel depressed and terrible all day. The truth, really--it doesn't matter, it really doesn't. And three years ago I would have been fine not wearing makeup, I didn't care at all what anybody thought--and my friends, sometimes I can't stand because they hate makeup, but you know, I've come to realise that they're better than I am, that they have the mental attitude that I think everyone needs, to not worry about appearance. That someone should love you because of who you are, not what you look like. And I'm trying to get more towards that goal. I've stopped carrying makeup with me wherever I go. It's like a temptation--if I have a mirror, I'm going to make sure I look okay. I think I look bloody brilliant, and when I take a picture it looks terrible! But I mean, I am what I am. And really, nobody is going to see that blackhead from five feet away, unless you completely pack it down with concealer and make a big notice out of it, or spend ten minutes every class period powdering yourself. That just..I don't know, it looks stuck up and arrogant to be so obsessed with your appearance in a place where you should really just let it go and be yourself.
Anyways, sorry that was a big long rant.

1 comment:

  1. Aww... D.B. try and not be too hard on yourself. You certainly have the right attitude. It really doesn't matter how we look. It's just hard with Hollywood and Tv showing us constantly what "beauty" should look like. P.S. I had the same feelings at 15 too. But you get through it as you grow and experience life. From the way you write your thoughts,you seem like a very caring young woman. Who wants to do the right thing. I have a very good friend who doesn't like to wear make-up or nail polish. And sometimes I feel,"vain" around her. Because I wear both all the time...lol! We're both mom's with three kids each. And sometimes I think I'm silly for all the primping I do in front of the mirror. Like maybe I'm being a bad mom,spending time putting make-up on. Anyway...I know that I'm not being an awful mother. And sometimes I feel sorry for my friend who never wears any make-up or polish. Like she's missing out on how much fun it is to be a woman. It's all about balance. The key is being comfortable with who God made you to be. And that just takes time,and growth in the Lord. I'm sorry to have left such a long comment, or lecture you....I didn't mean to do that. Your make-up looks very pretty in the pictures.